I was just reading through the posts that I’d written some two to three years ago, and boy, what a huge difference those posts are to what I’m writing now. A couple of days ago, when I had trouble sleeping at night because:
I fe a) l asleep at 8.00 p.m. reading Economics all the way until 10.00 p.m.
I b) I wanted to prove a point to Pei Ling, my role model, who scolded me for sleeping late for the sake of finishing Chemistry (and *cough* getting all my calculations wrong due to sheer tiredness), that I can indeed sleep before midnight
c) I even texted her right before I slept: “I’m going to sleep now (11.30 p.m.). I am a guai hai zi!”
Well yeah, so I had trouble falling asleep… until say maybe 2.00 a.m.? Lol. I know that totally defeated the very purpose of climbing into bed early. Haha!
Back to the point though. I realised at that point that I had stopped trying to collect memories. The camera I had purchased now lies dormantly on my table and this blog is well, sort of dead.
I suppose a lot of people have different opinions about how they would expect their college lives to turn out to be, and my friends would share different views about their entire college experience. For me though, I think for most of the time this year, for goodness knows what reasons, I’ve been kinda like ground zero – subjected to many many “bombs”.
Like this one time, I was marvelling over my clothes folding skills which I’ve learnt from Martha Stewart. Yup. I was gloating while walking back from Rock to Sze Hong.
Me: I think it looks very nice. So square!
Sze Hong: Yea, it’ll be a miracle if it turns out circular, don’t you think?!
*speechless*
It’s been a little difficult trying to post up lame jokes because I’ve had to translate. So yesterday, while saying goodbye to Pei Ling who’s going back for the study break, I gave her an English farewell.
“Role model: Wish you one road smooth wind. Small heart walk road. Return home good good book. No want give self too big pressure power. You can do it!”
I try. I really try.
But my lame personality is probably not very appreciated around here. =( Which I sometimes don’t understand, because there were moments when I feel their topics of conversation are even lamer than my jokes and yet they can laugh their hearts out. And in return for my inability to comprehend with the funniness of it all, I’m accused of bearing a “kiam pak” expression, which to them is equivalent to blur and in their very strange dictionary, is probably unforgivable.
But the year is coming to an end so rather than dwelling upon the moments when I don’t get all their deep deep Chinese jokes, I shall focus instead on the happier moments. I very often get away with my very poor mandarin by giving an expression I deem appropriate unless I get caught red-handed doing so.
Alexie: *says something*
Me: *laughs*
Alexie: You understand what I said?
Me: No, I just think it’s appropriate for me to laugh!
Alexie is kinda like my Chinese sifu, who also happens to be my fringe barber and my hair manager. She is the only person who can answer my ridiculous questions about the Chinese language patiently. Granted, sometimes I ask just a lil too much. :)
Me: When someone says “You have no heart liver”, why must they include liver? The heart, I understand coz it can feel emotions so to speak, but why insult the liver together with it?
Given other people, they would have peng-ed on the spot. Haha.
Alexie once asked me whether I faced any barrier when I first tried to fit into the Chinese speaking community. I told her I don’t, because the Chinese language, unlike English, doesn’t really have a lot of grammar. So that but for my limited vocabulary, the way I speak can hardly be used to tell that I’m not a native Chinese speaker. The case is different with English because people can tell. Without the need to be Professor Higgins.
She said she would rather be in my shoes. But I tell her nah. It ain’t that great, really. Someday, the world is going to be more appreciative of people who are in touch with their own culture. And during that someday, I will be at the losing end. Perhaps it’s time I work a tad harder to polish up me Chinese.
I also just realised I’d completely diverted from the topic I originally intended to write on, but I have class in 3 minutes and WACE in 3 weeks. Guess I’ll get to the point next time. Haha!
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